English Language?

I got this in one of those work E-mails.
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We should all be aware of the following moves to harmonise the language:

The European commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will
be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was
the other possibility.

As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English
spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5- year phase-in
plan that would become known as "Euro-English" (or preferably, "SI
English").

In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make
the sivil servants jump with joy. The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of
"k". This should klear up konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.
There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the
troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like
fotograf 20% shorter.

In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to
reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.

Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always
ben a deterent to akurate speling.

Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is
disgrasful and it should go away.

By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with
"z" and "w" with "v".

During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords containing "ou"
and after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.

Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu
understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.

Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze
forst plas.

By the time i got to the bottom of the link, at the back of my mind i had a mental picture of Basil Fawlty, goose stepping around, shouting "DON'T MENTION THE WAR" :

[quote="violentviolet"]By the time i got to the bottom of the link, at the back of my mind i had a mental picture of Basil Fawlty, goose stepping around, shouting "DON'T MENTION THE WAR" :


Best video I've seen in a long time.

teehee i enjoyed that - and in the 3rd quarter it was very reminiscent of txt spk, could this be a hidden plan on the new generation afterall?!

That was great reading! -- Thanks for sharing Liono


ViVi, Very nice Video

You wish...

I've been sent that before - very funny

And as for the Basil Fawlty clip... (no offence to any Germans).

I picked up the complete 1st and 2nd series of Fawlty Towers in a charity shop for £1 recently. The best £1 I've ever spent!

Ripping Yarns with Michael Palin was very funny too post Python. The scenes where he builds an Ice breaker in woodwork class at school or where his dad comes home and wreaks the house after his beloved football team lose 8-1 is hilarious.

8-1

8 bl****dy 1!

Nice one. I've seen it several times before and it still makes me laugh

ze zing is vry funny!