You mention the Netherlands...if that's where you're from then I'm not sure how much this will help since I only know the US rules.
Airspace rules can get a bit complicated...they're not rocket science but there is a lot of memorizing (if, for instance, you're getting a real-life private pilot certificate). What you mostly need to know is that for VFR flight, each airspace type has its own set of clearance/entry requirements, visibility minimums, cloud separation minimums and equipment minimums (there is some overlap). For IFR flight you're completely under the control of ATC and under a completely different set of rules (I'm only VFR rated and I don't know much about IFR flight).
I won't list out the various VFR rules here but there's loads of info on the web. Here's just a couple of links I found from a quick Google:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Airspace_class
http://flytandem.com/airspace.htm
For the offical details, you can have a look at chapter 3 of the FAA's Aeronautical Information Manual (kind of required reading for pilots):
As for charts, again I can only speak to how it works in the US. The basic chart for VFR flight is the sectional, which covers a reasonably large area. Near the major cities you can also get a Terminal chart which give a bit more detail of the area immediately surrounding large airports. Chart reading is skill you learn during pilot training, but yes, this is one of the ways you can get information on ATC frequencies. Here's a helpful link for more on charts:
http://www.navfltsm.addr.com/vfrcharts.htm
I'd say the best advice is to head down a local airport and see if they have any expired charts they can sell you for cheap. If you're only using them for simming then it's not so important that they're current.
Another good source of info on airports is the Airport/Facility Directory (aka...the little green book):
http://naco.faa.gov/index.asp?xml=naco/online/d_afd
Not sure if this exists for Europe though.
I hope this helps.